Controlling Women

Finally some advice for men! This advice is for Seth who asked;

"The girl that I'm dating wants me to do all of these stupid things like wear a shirt, shave my face, clean my room, take out the trashes, do the dishes, etc. What do I do?" He continues by saying, "She even goes so far as to ask me to change my underwear EVERY DAY"

Seth it sounds like you have a common case of girlssuckandwanttoruinyourlife-itis . The only way to cure this is to dump that hoe and start reading fantasy books...oh and be alone for the rest of your life.  Since i know you personally and know that you are a lover of women and unable to quit, I will teach you how to bare these afflictions.

Clothing
If your woman is trying to make you wear a shirt she is essentially saying that she hates your body. If she wants you to change you underwear she is saying that your natural smell is repulsive and that you as a person are undesirable. That only way to counteract this is the agree with her when she asks if her butt looks fat in those jeans and tell her that she doesn't actually look just as pretty without makeup.

 Shaving
I am writing these words while I have a mustache. It doesn't effect who I am. Never shave for a woman. Women's number one goal is to make us as much like them as possible and restricting facial hair is their favorite tool. I say we release a virus that makes every woman grow a beard. ALL FOR BEARDS AND BEARDS FOR ALL!!

 Housework

Unfortunately housework has become a unisex activity. There are only two options for avoiding doing it. 

Option 1: (see picture)

Option 2: Cover everything that needs to be cleaned in chocolate. The second your woman gets home she will lick everything clean!  She won't even be mad when she finds out that you tricked her and you will most likely get some action afterwards.

So that is my advice. I hope it was helpful and I hope that you and your clearly abusive girlfriend find happiness.